Just found out yesterday that our dear Tabitha finally has a blog. Went to read it and OMG I can't belief the posts she put. Seriously Tabitha, you need some anger-management therapy counseling. You've like deadly fury that's screaming to come out inside of you and be unleashed upon the world.
Later at night went for the IYA (International Year of Astronomy, see I know one ok ;) ) at Japanese Garden with Zhen Yuan, which apparently, is inside Chinese Garden O.o Really cool event. First time going for this kind of thing. I got a balloon :D and there were free candy floss and pop corn. Later at night, we went for the sort of introductory lesson on stars. It's inside a portal planetarium, some dome thing. Inside there's a projector which simulate the stars and the forms they represent. Ben and Serene came later. The garden was like a refugee camp. Everywhere were people lying down on mats.Good thing I came prepared. I used my sleeping bag so that we can lie down and look properly at the sky.
Out of the whole time, I only saw one shooting star :/ but that was good enough. Made a wish. It was my first time seeing a shooting star. It felt so surreal. Happened in a blink of an eye. Makes you wonder if you had really seen it. There's that bright flash of white light coming down and that was it. Poor Serene, she took all the trouble of sneaking out of her house at 2 in the morning but didn't even see one shooting star.
Hm...Gui Wu is having second thoughts about Giraffe. In one small corner of my heart, I hoped for this day to come. But now seeing her suffer like this, the way i did, makes it all wrong. Now that things are turning out like this, I'm not give up on myself again. After what's happened, makes me realise how important Gui Wu is to me. Yee Liang, I'll need to take back that thing from you.
my second voice
- 8:22 PM
Rugby doesn't seem to help at all. Everything seems gloomy nowadays. Even the sun doesn't come out now. Been considering somethings and discussing with Yee Liang.
16/11
my second voice
- 7:45 PM
Couldn't sleep last night. Kept thinking about it. I know it's the good of you but didn't know it'll hurt this much.
Really love you so much. Knowing my own shortcomings, I know I'm not good enough for you. You're moved by words, which I couldn't do it. Whenever I look at both of you from behind, you both look very compatible. I can't bear to be the third party and spoil your happiness. He's the better man. That's why I did not commit myself and just let things flow. You are always my priority. Love till it hurts. I just ask only one thing from you. Stay happy. Wish both of you all the best.
Received the sms that I got selected for OGL. I'm supposed to be overjoyed, but I'm not. Didn't go to ecp in the end. Better not go there alone. Instead went to play rugby match. Use pain to heal the pain.
my second voice
- 7:51 PM
Going to the beach tomorrow.
12/11
my second voice
- 9:13 PM
There are so many things that I want to say to you face to face, but there was never the right place or the right time. I'm sorry for putting you in this situation.
I just want you to be happy.
11/11
my second voice
- 9:36 AM
Went to watch My Sister's Keeper yesterday evening. Jain Lin didn't want to go so end up only Ben Ben, Yee Liang and me went. Really touching and heartbreaking story. Bring tissue along if your planning to watch it. I almost had tears weld up in my eyes. Well, Ben Ben cried. I didn't know what to do or say to her, so I only smiled at her :/ Great show, best one out of the three movies I've watched. I shall not reveal the story cuz then it would spoil the emotional impact. All I can say is that there's a twist in the end. The show made me do a bit of soul searching as well.
Later went to eat. While we ate, we shared a bit of things. I learnt a bit about Yee Liang. Got kena ganged by Ben Ben and Yee Liang. Both suan me and I got confused. I think I'm too much of a straightforward guy, every time they say something with some implied meaning, I don't catch it. Better start leveling up.
Hmm...I think I'll probably only stop thinking about Gui Wu if Gui Wu becomes an evil and mean person. Gui Wu told me there is a Wu Gui. Really wanted to know who's that lucky guy. Then Gui Wu later said there's isn't. But the things Gui Wu said before and after don't coincide. Hmm...shall investigate on that.
Really anxious about the OGL. I really hope I get selected. I planned my whole holidays according to the OGL schedule. I really dread going back for holiday. I dread going back to talk with my dad, the whole 'your future' discussion. I dread having no friends and having nowhere to go. It's all because I don't have anything to do other than study when I go back, that I took up golf. But I want to see my relatives, my cousins, and most of all my grandpa. Each time I go back to see him, he seems to get frailer and frailer. I hope he's still healthy. I don't know how long things will stay this way but I wish that it'll continue as long as it could. Although I might not be close with him, I still respect him and there's always a place for him in my heart. He's very nice to the children. I still remember my childhood when my brother would go visit him, he'll always buy our favourite food and give us money to play arcade. Then before we leave, he'll always give us some pocket money each. Always looked forward to visit his house. Hmm...memories.
Really no motivation to do work. Been slacking for very very long now, feel like a hypocrite. Really looking forward to the earful that my dad is going to give me tomorrow. Feel like going to the beach. Hai...that's it for now.
7/11/09
my second voice
- 4:30 PM
Here to blog again. Got a lot of things to write. Let's start with Monday. Had chinese a level. I didn't I can't really score for the paper. Compo ending was not good. Then the paper 2 was so difficult. A lot of chim words. Oh well, just glad that it's over now. What's done is done. Don't really want to dwell over it. Yesterday was interesting, I must say Mr Oh has his ways of improving our OP. Made people stand on stage and present without the slides. Reason for it? So that they won't refer to the slides and left with nothing to do but to look at the audience. Then another one was to make us stand opposite each other and look, but for serene is stare, at each other's forehead or eyebrows, also to improve our awareness of audience.
Was really worried that night, scared that I won't even be shortlisted for the interview because I had no leadership experience. Then today found out that I was in. What a relief. Went for the interview in the afternoon. I think I did ok. Now, another thing to worry about. Hope I get selected >.< fingers crossed. OP rehearsal was ok I think, but there's always room for improvement. After the interview, we went to the 'secret location' to learn the 'secret "beat it"'. I must really do it good, a practice for being a porper ogl. But seriously, that pelvis movement way out of my league, and it didn't when Tommy was the one who's doing it. When I saw it, I was like O.O , but then still must do on that day. Hmph...prove that I can dance. But Ben Ben was really enthu about it, she keep practicing and saying "Eh, do again, do again".
Been playing cafe world for about a week now, Ben Ben was the one who introduced it and I was bored. Yee Liang and Jian Lin are also playing now. I WANT MY DUNGEON THEME!!!!! But the deco and items are so expensive Y_Y but nvm I have patience. I will complete it one day Ben Ben, just wait ^^ and it won't take a year.
Now, for some important stuff. Talked to erm....let's call it Gui Wu, about what I wanted to say. Really appreciate Gui Wu for being such a nice person. I don't know, even I myself thought that I won't have the courage to say it but I actually did. Maybe Gui Wu gave me courage. Really quite fond of Gui Wu, everytime I see Gui Wu smile, everything seem to be better. I hope we'll still be close no matter what. Now I can only wait and see how things will turn out. I'll wait.
Hm...really worried about someone. Seems that times are really hard for him now. Don't really know how to help him and I'm like stuck in the middle. Hang in there bro.
4/11/09
my second voice
- 4:43 PM
Ok, here to blog again. Went to JP to watch Jennifer's Body on Friday. Suppose to be only 8 people watching, Ben Ben, Yang Jun, Yee Liang, Xiu Jin, Zhen Yuan, Nwe Nwe, Jian Lin and me. Gary only told Jian Lin that he's not going so we ended up buying 9 tickets. Luckily, the ladies used thier charm and diplomatic skills to get a refund for Gary's ticket ^^ Honestly, the movie was not good and I expected it not to be. Anticipated that it's a lousy movie which just used Megan Fox showing some skin to attract viewers. But I went to watch to enjoy the company. After movie, we went to Banquet to eat. Later we went to a viod deck to chill. Jian Lin brought booze and a few of us tried it. I took a really really small sip. Never liked beer, it still taste like shit to me. Tried it when I was young and didn't like it but thought when I grow old I would like it, but it doesn't seem so. We played turth and truth and came up with a lot of funny and random questions.
Hmm...been thinking about it and finally decided not to consult. It's my feelings and I'm sure of it. I don't need to know what others feel or what they'll do if they were me. Funny. I've going one big round just to realise that it's just near me. Didn't even see it coming but I finally realised. Thinking about it make me feel really stupid, I should have notice sooner. But whatever the outcome, I'll not regret. About time that I stand up and have the courage.
Been slacking the whole week, didn't even do any work. Will start doing chem homework next week. Tomorrow is chinese a level. Hope I can write finish a decent compo >.< That's all for now.
1/11/09
my second voice
- 7:41 AM